Tuesday, May 11, 2010

5 We must protect this house

Today has been an interesting day.  It seems that the Price house is a little on edge right now.  Yesterday, our neighbor's house was broken into.  Robberies can happen in any city but it really makes you aware of your surroundings when it happens in your neighborhood.  What makes it scary is I was home alone when it happened yet had no clue until Raleigh's mom came home and she saw our neighbor.  Today, Mrs. Price and I decided to go out to eat for lunch and Raleigh calls me minutes after we left saying that our house alarm was going off.  We race back home and start blaring our horn outside of our house.  I guess we thought we would be scaring off the bad guys but it ended up just being a false alarm.  I am glad because if I had seen a bad guy run out of our house I do believe I would have had a heart attack and the horn would not do us any good!!!!!

After that scare, we ate some lunch and then headed to the hospital to see the girls.  Our amazing pastors met us at the NICU so they could pray over Adeline and Maralee.  After scrubbing our hands up and down, we walked into their shared room with 17 other little ones and started to receive the updated report from the nurse and doctor.  Turns out, the little infection that Maralee might have is actually a real staff infection.  The doctor told  us it could be caused by the ventilator tube that is down her throat right now or it could have been passed on to her from any of the doctors, nurses, etc. that have been checking her in the hospital.  She has started on antibiotics but since she has this infection she is now on quarantine.  There is a big red box around her incubator and this is to show that anybody that touches her needs to wear gloves and a sterile hospital gown.  This also means that she will probably be in isolation until she gets to go home. 

That was hard news for us to hear.  All in all, this is something that is common around the hospital but it is just an added thing for Maralee's body to fight.  It is taking a lot of willpower to not be angry at this situation.  This almost seems like something that someone else gave her; not something that was caused by her premature birth.  It is so easy to place blame on this unknown person that accidentally gave her this infection but I am starting to figure out that I can't go down this road of pointing fingers.  Through their lives, many people are going to accidentally cause harm to my children.  As their mom, I need to just go ahead and forgive this person and pray that healing will come.  As always, this is easier said than done :)

Friends, it pains me to see my little girl going through so much.  I do realize that God is taking any discomfort from her little body right now and whispering sweet things to her, but it kills me to see that red line around her "house."  I know that the red line is keeping the bad guys out but it is also keeping me out.  I want to protect her, to hold her and tell her everything is going to be alright, but even I, her mom, can't get close to her.  The little privilege that we had of touching her has been taken away and now we have to fully trust in Jesus' love for Maralee right now. 

I don't think I have told this story yet, but Maralee's name was the first name that Raleigh and I thought of for the girls.  We loved the idea of combining family names into one new name.  Maralee's name originated from my Paw Paw, Marion Jackson  and Raleigh's Nan Nan, Okalee.  My Paw Paw has always been someone that I have admired.  He has such faith in Christ and has the lines on his hands to show his labor in life has been for the Lord.  My Paw Paw has always been on the smaller side but boy could he run back in his day!  His nickname was Jack "Rabbit" and he ran track and played football for Auburn.  Raleigh's grandmother is also someone to admire because she has shown such strength for so many years.  Her husband died of a heart attack when Raleigh was young but she continues on with her life.  She cooks, goes to work, and has even learned how to use the computer. :)  She is truly a woman of noble character that knows how to keep her family together. 

Since we chose Maralee's name first, we decided to give it to Baby B.  It was our way of making things fair for Baby A.  Looking at both of my girls, I know that their names already fit their personalities.  The name Adeline reminds me of "Sweet Caroline" and I think she looks so sweet and peaceful laying in her incubator.  She doesn't move much yet she loves to hold our hands when we touch her.  Inside my womb, I always felt Baby B kicking and squirming around and Maralee is obviously that baby now.  She is a little fighter and she isn't going to let this yucky mess get the best of her. 

I look down at Maralee and she reminds me that I need to be a fighter too.  I need to be strong and show courage when I get these kind of reports.  It is so hard because I feel like the devil is using her to get to me.  He knows that we thought of her name first so he is attacking her harder than Adeline right now.  It is symbolic to me that the line around her incubator is red.  The color red can easily be associated with satan and I just pray that God's angels are inside of that red tape blocking out the arsenal that he is throwing at our baby girl.  This is truly a war that we are caught in right now. 

This afternoon, riding home in the car, Mrs. Price reminded me of the battle of the good and bad angels over Moses' body.  Deuteronomy 34:6 tells us that the Lord buried Moses and to this day no one knows where his grave is.  God buried him so the devil couldn't use Moses' remains against God's chosen people.   Hebrews 3: 1-14 tells us,

"Therefore, holy brothers, who share in the heavenly calling, fix your thoughts on Jesus, the apostle and high priest whom we confess.  He was faithful to the one who appointed him, just as Moses was faithful in all God's house.  Jesus has been found worthy of greater honor than Moses, just as the builder of a house has greater honor than the house itself.  For every house is built by someone, but God is the builder of everything.  Moses was faithful as a servant in all God's house, testifying to what would be said in the future.  But Christ is faithful as a son over God's house.  And we are his house, if we hold on to our courage and the hope of which we boast.  So, as the Holy Spirit says: "Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion, during the time of testing in the desert, where your fathers tested and tried me and for forty years saw what I did.  That is why I was angry with that generation, and I said, 'Their hearts are always going astray, and they have not known my ways.  So I declared on oath in my anger, 'They shall never enter my rest.'  See to it, brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God.  But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness.  We have come to share in Christ if we hold firmly till the end the confidence we had at first."

Friends, many of you have been so sweet and encouraging to me as I go through this situation.  I am no superwoman, I am just a girl that became a mom and is now trying her best to hold things together.  I have to be faithful...I am nowhere near Moses, but I have to be a faithful servant to God's house right now.  I can't have a hardened heart during this situation, I have to have courage and faith in Christ.  I thank you for your daily encouragement and am so thankful for Today because it is another day that I get to share with these beautiful little girls.

Below are two pictures that I wanted to share.  In the first picture, the tube that is going through Maralee's mouth is the ventilator.  Please pray that she will start to breathe on her own so she can go back on the CPAP that is going through her nose in the second picture.  This device allows her to breathe better.  We need to pray that both girls will get on the CPAP quickly so they can start to digest their food.  Praise God that all other reports are looking good right now. 


Till next time, let your light shine!

Blessings, christen
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Friday, April 2, 2010

0 Good Friday

Happy Good Friday!

Friends, I hope all of you have a wonderful Easter weekend!  We are heading to Dothan to celebrate this wonderful holiday with our families.  Yesterday, I went on a walk through our neighborhood with my new camera and took some pictures of all the pretty flowers blooming.  It is no coincidence to me that spring appears in full bloom right as we are remembering the crucifixion of Jesus Christ and how he rose from the grave.  He loves us so much! 

"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." - Ephesians 5:1-2


This is what is written: The Christ will suffer and rise from the dead on the third day, and repentance and forgiveness of sins will be preached in his name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem....When he had led them out to the vicinity of Bethany, he lifted up his hands and blessed them.  While he was blessing them, he left them and was taken up into heaven.  Then they worshipped him and returned to Jerusalem with great joy.  And they stayed continually at the temple, praising God." - Luke 24:46-53"

Till next time, let your light shine!

Blessings, christen
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Monday, October 12, 2009

Don't you just love a holiday? I've got the day off today and it has been much needed. I got caught up on some sleep, did some laundry, ate lunch with a friend, and now I get to write another blog post. I call that a pretty good day. :) I just can't help myself, but today is another post about my weekend. Forgive me, you will probably see at least one more this week about my trip to Memphis. It was just too good not to share!

The theme for the weekend was titled, "Wild God Chase." Beth spoke from Exodus 34:1-9. The meat of that passage was this: "The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin." (Exodus 34:6-7)

She touched on each of those topics but the one I want to share with you today is about forgiveness. Beth stated that God is scandalously forgiving. He forgives us for our wickedness that we are prone to do, our rebellion that we mean to do, and our sin, which we are bound to do. It is such a life lesson for us to know that God forgives us of all of our faults, whether we mean to or not, yet we often struggle with forgiving others.

Forgiveness is something that I have had to learn how to do over the years. For me, the thing that pains me the most is hurtful words. When somebody says something ugly to me or about me it is like a sword slashing through my heart. I cry out in agony and I suffer from those words. The wound is so deep and I am uncertain if it will ever fully heal. From the outside, I might look all clean and shiny but on the inside I am black and blue.

Beth spoke about how a girl commented on her blog that often she "fake forgives." We rip the band aid off before the forgiveness has mended the wound. I know I am a host to fake forgiving. The thing that has always bothered me about forgiveness is the fact that I have to forgive but it is hard for me to forget. I struggle with that saying because I know that God releases me from what I did and I am washed clean, but it is so hard for me to do that to others. For instance, when my feelings get hurt, I tend to not forget who hurt my feelings because I don't want them to do it to me again. I am guarded against that person. I usually start to not like that person because they hurt me. I also have these fake conversations in my head of what I really wish I would have said when they said something ugly to me. I just keep hitting rewind and I replay the scenario over and over and over in my head. It absolutely drives me crazy.

Friends, fake forgiving is neither healthy of beneficial to our well being. It does no good. To truly forgive, we have to take time to go through the healing process. Most of the time, the person that was ugly to me in the first place has no idea how deep they really cut me. I guarantee you that person is not losing sleep or having these crazy conversations in her head! I have just recently reached a point in my life where I understand the process of true forgiveness. In order for me to live a joyful, sane life that is not filled with garbage, I must forgive like God forgives me. I must be like Jesus on the cross and say, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." (Luke 23:34).

I know you have heard this a million times, but we have to pray for our enemies. This is such a testament of your mature life in Christ. When I began to pray for my enemy, the victim side of me began to kick and scream saying "She doesn't deserve your forgiveness! Don't you remember what she did to you? She hurt you so bad and now you are letting her off the hook?" Then, another side of me whispers these words of encouragement "Forgive her. Let it go. Stop letting her words eat you up inside." As I struggled with this wrestling match going on inside of my head, I finally just broke down and stopped fighting. I just prayed for God to show his love to me and to please help me forgive this person for what she did to me. After I did this, I was encompassed with God's peace and love. It is an amazing feeling to know that He is on my side. It was like seeing a rainbow after the storm.

This verse sums up everything, "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." (Ephesians 4:32)

Till next time, let your light shine!

Blessings, christen
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Tuesday, August 25, 2009

0 Create a Pure Heart

Good morning sweet friends!

Is anybody else in LOVE with this weather we have been having? Yesterday, we took the dogs on a walk after work and it was absoulutely perfect. During the day, I so wished to just take a blanket and go lay in a park to enjoy the sunshine. Being outside on such a pretty day just makes me feel so peaceful and pleasant.

The past couple of days, I have been reading in the bible about David. Yesterday, I read aboout how David conquered Goliath. I had forgotten how fun it was to read a story that I knew so well. My reason for reading this is that Raleigh needs some encouragement right now. He is in the middle of taking his architecture review exams and he is up against a Goliath. Don't we all have Goliath's in our lives?

If you have time, flip your Bibles open to 1 Samuel and read chapters 16 and 17. One of the verses that really stuck out to me was, "The Lord does not look at things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart"(1 Samuel 16:7). The Lord said that David had a heart like His, and that was why He seeked him out to serve his people as King. The story of David begins with his battle with Goliath but throughout his life he faces many personal battles and victories. The thing that sticks out to me when reading his story is that through it all he either asks for forgiveness from the Lord or he rejoices in the Lord. He knows he cannot live his life without God. So many of us run around thinking we can do it ourselves or that we don't need God to help us out with this task but the truth is that we cannot live our lives without Him!!!! He wants to hear you cry out to him, and He wants to help you every step of the way. David, strong and tender, says in Psalm 55:16-17, "But I call to God and the Lord saves me. Evening, morning, & noon I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice."

If you are afraid to go to him after you have messed up terribly, please take the step to talk to Him because He is the forgiver of all sins. After David committed adultery with Bathseba he cried out to the Lord, "Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me." The word "create" means as something new so even when our hearts are so broken and messed up, he will give us a brand new, pure heart to start fresh and clean.

Allow God to come into your heart if you haven't done so already. And if you have, allow Him to work at it and make it a heart like His.
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